Rewinding 2011

Tonight the sun will set for the last time in the year 2011 and when we all wake up tomorrow to make coffee and get ready for our day we will be beginning a whole new year. Like so many others I've been reflective over the last couple of days about the changes that have occurred in what seems like a year that flew by at record speed. My children are considerably taller and my son started his first year of preschool which was simply surreal. Oh yeah, and this year I reached the big 3-0. That was a big non-experience! I think reaching middle age is a little more hyped up than it should be because I hardly feel any different than when I was in my 20's, but I suppose age is relative..or is it?...

Perhaps the biggest change I've experienced this year has been in terms of my faith and personal beliefs. Many of you who read this blog have been witness to this gradual evolution of thought and belief that has occurred progressively throughout the year. In the beginning of 2011 I had God wrapped in a nicely bound package that was very attractive to behold yet very small and delicate.  It bore a label which I would display with pride to all who would listen and see. 

As my search for God continued throughout the year the contents of that package kept pressing outwards and the light emanating from within shone through the spaces that were forming between the sides nearly opening. Finally, I decided to take a pair of scissors myself and snip the last ribbons that bound it, watching its contents spill open and wash everything with its light. At that moment I fell off the radar of organized religion and more fully into the arms of God.

My interpretation of God's nature and reality has found itself transformed.  Jesus is still a shining light on my path, leading me with his teachings of compassion, of shedding ego and discovering the Divine, of peace and love. I feel God has gotten infinitely bigger, though, since I began my thirsty pursuit of Him. I've opened up to the reality that He transcends any category man could possibly put Him into and that His Divine spark is within each and every person, not just those who might choose a particular path or doctrine. I have begun to see Him in everything and everything in Him.  I continue to read the Scriptures and find them encouraging  and consider them inspired but have also increased my scope of spiritual material into incorporating texts like the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads and Tao te Ching. I've found it both fascinating and edifying learning many of the different ways in which others have come to view God/reality and His eternal truths.

Above all, I have discovered this year that we are to be true to ourselves in our spiritual journeys towards truth and understanding. As the Buddha once said, "Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others." People may have the best intentions in giving us advice or trying to persuade us in certain directions but when it comes down to it we are all responsible for what we believe and knowing why. It might be wise to heed some advice, but I think it's important to remember that what others have to tell us is their interpretation of the truth based on other people's interpretations of the truth. All we need is already inside of us, God Himself, to guide us in interpreting the truth for ourselves.

New Year's resolutions are running viral  on blogs across the blogosphere  and social networking sites as the year nears its end. I suppose I'll jump in and leave my thoughts on my resolutions in closing. I do have some particular goals I'd love to acheive this year: I plan on studying more closely the integrative philosophy of Ken Wilber as well as the Bible,  Upanishads and other inspired texts. I also want to concentrate on reading as many books by Alan Watts as is humanly possible! If you haven't gotten to check him out yet, I'd highly encourage becoming familiar with a philosopher that will have you truly engaged and provoked in thought. You can check out some of his quotes here: http://www.ascendingthehills.blogspot.com/p/alan-watts-quotes.html

I've been volunteering at a local soup kitchen this past year, but sparodically and one of my other goals is to increase my involvement there. Another is to continue to share my passion of nature with my children. It brings me great joy to see their senses awaken in wonder to the treasures the natural world has to offer them. Lastly, meditation is probably my most primary of goals for the coming year. This practice increases my awareness of the present moment during my day, helping me experience reality to its fullest and cultivate an increasing awareness of God within. It is my view that meditation can aid me in actualizing all of the  goals I listed. It gives me the focus, awareness, discernment, sense of peace and patience to aid me in my pursuits. I will be focusing on Vipassana meditation as well as Eknath Easwaran's technique of passage meditation and mantra repetition. And of course, I will be blogging about all of my experiences and the interesting ideas and things I learn. I look forward to sharing them with you and hearing your thoughts on them!

Have you made any New Year's resolutions? I'd love to hear them. Please share in the comments section!

Happy New Year! May yours be one full of peace, joy, light and love!