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Sharing the insights I discover as I explore and experience the mystery that is our reality. Join me in my journey and share yours.




Saturday, December 31, 2011

Rewinding 2011





Tonight the sun will set for the last time in the year 2011 and when we all wake up tomorrow to make coffee and get ready for our day we will be beginning a whole new year. Like so many others I've been reflective over the last couple of days about the changes that have occurred in what seems like a year that flew by at record speed. My children are considerably taller and my son started his first year of preschool which was simply surreal. Oh yeah, and this year I reached the big 3-0. That was a big non-experience! I think reaching middle age is a little more hyped up than it should be because I hardly feel any different than when I was in my 20's, but I suppose age is relative..or is it?...

Perhaps the biggest change I've experienced this year has been in terms of my faith and personal beliefs. Many of you who read this blog have been witness to this gradual evolution of thought and belief that has occurred progressively throughout the year. In the beginning of 2011 I had God wrapped in a nicely bound package that was very attractive to behold yet very small and delicate.  It bore a label which I would display with pride to all who would listen and see. 

As my search for God continued throughout the year the contents of that package kept pressing outwards and the light emanating from within shone through the spaces that were forming between the sides nearly opening. Finally, I decided to take a pair of scissors myself and snip the last ribbons that bound it, watching its contents spill open and wash everything with its light. At that moment I fell off the radar of organized religion and more fully into the arms of God.

My interpretation of God's nature and reality has found itself transformed.  Jesus is still a shining light on my path, leading me with his teachings of compassion, of shedding ego and discovering the Divine, of peace and love. I feel God has gotten infinitely bigger, though, since I began my thirsty pursuit of Him. I've opened up to the reality that He transcends any category man could possibly put Him into and that His Divine spark is within each and every person, not just those who might choose a particular path or doctrine. I have begun to see Him in everything and everything in Him.  I continue to read the Scriptures and find them encouraging  and consider them inspired but have also increased my scope of spiritual material into incorporating texts like the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads and Tao te Ching. I've found it both fascinating and edifying learning many of the different ways in which others have come to view God/reality and His eternal truths.

Above all, I have discovered this year that we are to be true to ourselves in our spiritual journeys towards truth and understanding. As the Buddha once said, "Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others." People may have the best intentions in giving us advice or trying to persuade us in certain directions but when it comes down to it we are all responsible for what we believe and knowing why. It might be wise to heed some advice, but I think it's important to remember that what others have to tell us is their interpretation of the truth based on other people's interpretations of the truth. All we need is already inside of us, God Himself, to guide us in interpreting the truth for ourselves.

New Year's resolutions are running viral  on blogs across the blogosphere  and social networking sites as the year nears its end. I suppose I'll jump in and leave my thoughts on my resolutions in closing. I do have some particular goals I'd love to acheive this year: I plan on studying more closely the integrative philosophy of Ken Wilber as well as the Bible,  Upanishads and other inspired texts. I also want to concentrate on reading as many books by Alan Watts as is humanly possible! If you haven't gotten to check him out yet, I'd highly encourage becoming familiar with a philosopher that will have you truly engaged and provoked in thought. You can check out some of his quotes here: http://www.ascendingthehills.blogspot.com/p/alan-watts-quotes.html

I've been volunteering at a local soup kitchen this past year, but sparodically and one of my other goals is to increase my involvement there. Another is to continue to share my passion of nature with my children. It brings me great joy to see their senses awaken in wonder to the treasures the natural world has to offer them. Lastly, meditation is probably my most primary of goals for the coming year. This practice increases my awareness of the present moment during my day, helping me experience reality to its fullest and cultivate an increasing awareness of God within. It is my view that meditation can aid me in actualizing all of the  goals I listed. It gives me the focus, awareness, discernment, sense of peace and patience to aid me in my pursuits. I will be focusing on Vipassana meditation as well as Eknath Easwaran's technique of passage meditation and mantra repetition. And of course, I will be blogging about all of my experiences and the interesting ideas and things I learn. I look forward to sharing them with you and hearing your thoughts on them!


Have you made any New Year's resolutions? I'd love to hear them. Please share in the comments section!


Happy New Year! May yours be one full of peace, joy, light and love!


20 comments:

  1. Hi, Jessica! --

    Your post reminds me of one of my favorite songs by home-town boy, Peter Mayer "Everything is Holy Now": http://youtu.be/nfLI1l_Pda4

    Happy New Year!!!

    PS 30 is not middle age unless you only plan to live to 60, silly girl!!

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  2. Oh I'm going to have to listen to that song now! Thank you Linda! Well, it is my plan to live a lot longer than 60...so I guess you are right! :) Perhaps we should institute 50 as the new middle age. ;)

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  3. Careful now, Jessica, I'm 51 and I am not 'middle-aged' -- haha! I think 75 years old might be middle-age, although I reserve the right to push it back when I get there ;-)

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  4. lol Great point Linda! I think age might very well relative to some degree. I think there's much to the truth of "You are as old as you feel." ;)

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  5. I've not made out a list of my resolutions but while reflecting God mirrored areas in my life I should improve ~ value of time, prayer and spiritual life, continuous human formation, like you, greater involvement and dedication to my tasks. One of the most difficult is to be constantly aware of my temper.

    I love the ones you made. I'm glad you see your kids grow :) I have also observed how radically you've transformed in your way of thinking as well as spiritually.

    I'd like to thank you for journeying with me. I have learned a lot from you.

    Continue to grow in God's love and good luck in your quest to know Him deeply.

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  6. Love your resolutions, Jessica! Mine is to continue to grow, through prayer, study and meditation, in my walk with the Lord.
    God bless you richly in the new year!

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  7. Melissa...you are going to be working on some great things in the coming year! In fact, the most important things one can be engaged in. I wish you the best in the New Year...may it bring with it abundant blessings, increased growth spiritually with God, joy, peace and new beginnings. Love you sis! :)

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  8. There's never a dull moment with you, Jess. Good luck!

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  9. Great resolutions. Thanks for sharing Martha! May you grow ever deeper in God this coming year..I look forward to your daily devotions of 2012! :)

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  10. Thanks JR...I wish you the best in the coming new year! :)

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  11. I've certainly noticed you branching out in regards to religion and I admire your courage for doing so. It's my belief that God is found in the recesses of the heart and not limited to those that are involved with organized religion. Your 2012 resolutions sound great and surely you will achieve them!! Best of luck on your goals and Happy New Year to you and the family!!!

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  12. I resolve every day to learn and grow, much as you have done this past year. All the best to you, Jessica, in the new year and beyond. <3

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  13. Sounds as though you have mapped out some wonderful goals for the year. I am sure you will achieve each and every one of them. Your growth this year has been evident in your posts. Happy New year to you; I hope that you are blessed with sunshine and love.

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  14. I have resolved to live my life...enough of mopping around and feeling sorry for myself..this year is mine..and I intend to live it to the fullest..
    A very happy new year to u.

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  15. Happy new year! I love reading your posts more and more... not the cookie cutter religious posts. They have substance and meaning :) My resolutions are here http://throughmyinsanityandwhatelseisthere.blogspot.com/2012/01/old-year-new-year.html

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  16. Dear Jessica - I admire your yearning and seeking heart and wish you the very best with your resolutions....May you continue to grow in love and wisdom. Thank you for the friendship and inspiration in 2011. Love ya! ♥

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  17. Jessica, your blog is always an inspiration to me. I admire your strength and spirituality. I have not set resolutions for 2012 as of yet. Things in my life sometimes are so sporadic, that it seems difficult to set anything in stone. I guess that would be one? To be more routine? Not sure yet, but I do know that in years past, my resolutions come to me throughout the year :)

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  18. I've been thrilled to watch you make such huge strides along your path, Jessica! I have seldom encountered anyone as open as you are to new ideas and understandings and as passionate about pushing oneself to move onward and upward even when it means letting go of comforting "certainties" and old friends who will not or cannot understand where you're coming from or where you're going.

    I look forward to reading your blog in 2012 and seeing what the days, weeks, and months to come have in store for your spiritual aspirations and development.

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  19. Happy New Year dear friend!
    Wishing you a blessed and fruitful year in 2012.

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  20. This is my New Year's resolution, Jessica: to love myself more than last year to be able to love people more this year. Happy 2012!

    http://www.eyeof1001.blogspot.com

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